WHY BERTIE IS SO GOD DAMN SPECIAL TO ME

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WHY BERTIE IS SO GOD DAMN SPECIAL TO ME

Post  portwhore on Mon Feb 15, 2010 3:35 am

SO HERE I SIT IN MY EX WIVES TRAILER BECAUSE THE BANK TOOK MY MOTORHOME I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN I COULD NOT KEEP YING LU HAPPY. EVER SINCE I FOUND HER IN SAIGON IN 74 SHE AND I HAVE BEEN 'SAILIN AWAY' THRU LIFE TOGETHER BUT APPARENTLY THE ROAD ISNOT FOR EVERYONE I SURE BET BERTIE KNOWS THAT BY NOW. SO SHE IS BACK AT HER MOMS ABOVE THE LAUNDROMAT SHE SAYS SHE CAN ALWAYS GO BACK TO DOIN NAILS I GUESS SHE GOT IT FIGURE OUT. I GUESS I DONT HOW WILL I LIVE WITHOUT THE OPEN ROAD I DONT KNOW. BUT I DO KNOW THAT IF IT WERENT FOR BERTIE SAVING MY LIFE SO MANY TIMES ID HAVE CHOKED THAT SHRIEKING ASIAN BANSHEE BY NOW. SO IM GONNA THUMB IT DOWN TO BRANSON WITH A CHANGE OF UNDIES AND MY MOUTH HARP. I CAN STILL PLAY OK EVEN WITH THE HOOK. YA ASK THE DRAGON LADY WHY I GOTTA HOOK! SHE TOOK EVERYTHING PLUS MY HEART ANDMY FREEDOM. BUT NOT BERTIE. NO ONE CAN TAKE BERTIE AWAY FROM ME. SOMETIMES I DO FEEL LIKE HIS SONG ABOUT A PIRATE BEING 40 I CANT GET MYSELF TOGETHER. I AM SO HAPPY TO FIND THIS SITE IM BE ON HERE EVERYDAY MEETING NEW FRIENDS AND GET A MARGARITA MAYBE DUST OFF MY SALT SHAKER YA! THE DR SAID ALCOHOL IS FINE AS LONG AS ITS NOT A PILL. SO REMEMBER NEW FRIENDS KEY LARGO IS A NO GO WHEN THEY GOT A WARRANT BUT YOU CAN ALWAYS GO IN YOUR MIND AND HEART AND WITH BERTIE HIGGINS.

portwhore

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Re: WHY BERTIE IS SO GOD DAMN SPECIAL TO ME

Post  666boardinator on Tue Feb 16, 2010 3:59 am

I want to shake your hand soldier for All that you have given for this beautiful country.

Well Sir I too have been saved by the bone head.

My Wife and I were wed for 17 years until she passed suddenly in a hottub in a one time affair with our Guatemalan maid 4 years ago. I have discussed this extensively in other message boards so I will not go into any great length here. I gave up my career in Medical marketing at the Walgreen's and took up to patrolling the boarders of this great nation of ours. You see here in the great state of Texas there is a growing problem with Aliens. So nightly I roam the desert listening to DC Talk, Whitesnake and you guessed Bertie Higgins. As I run down these freedom hating Commies it is the soothing alto voice of Bertie that keeps me sane and reminds me that this great land of ours is a paradise that must be protected from those who would defile her supple body with their dirty hands. It is the duty of every freedom loving American to stand next to her and protect her virtue and innocents from Commies and foreigners. So my friend though I do not know you know the next time you load one of his great cassettes think of me sitting next to you in nodding along to his silky voice and Caribbean beats.

Remember that even though its bad right now there are literally hundreds of other boners out there that would gladly stand up for you.

Dually MacBrown

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Re: WHY BERTIE IS SO GOD DAMN SPECIAL TO ME

Post  portwhore on Tue Feb 16, 2010 4:09 am

and thank you sir for patrolling for our homeland. I never said that I was a soldier. I was just got to saigon from bangkok trying to find a real wife in bangkok all you find are ladyboys and i not into that i mean once in a while maybe but for at least the next few years i want the real thing know what im sayin? but im thru with orientals they just wont shut up maybe i come see you get a mexican dont know english.

portwhore

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